One way to conceptualize PTSD is it's the hijacking of one’s central nervous system by traumatic experiences, which have been paired with intense emotions, and then stored in a part of the brain that is not easily accessible. When triggered, the memories and emotions overwhelm a person's system to where they feel like they are reliving the original traumatic experience all over again, and can result in a trauma response, which onlookers often perceive as baffling behavior that cannot be understood. It is important to clarify the behavior is only “baffling” when it is not understood as being a trauma response. When one perceives the behavior through a trauma lens and has the "backstory,” if you will, the "baffling" behavior is not baffling at all, and in fact seems to make perfect sense.
That said, to an outsider looking in, and with having limited information about the person's history, the behavior of a person whose trauma has been triggered appears to be perplexing, if not altogether unbelievable. It seems to be disproportionate at best, and “crazy” at worst (not my word, but what is often used as a description to depict such behavior).
If you find yourself asking the question, “Did that just happen?”when trying to make sense of someone's behavior, it could be a trauma response you just witnessed. If you're using the words, “they just snapped” when retelling the story of a person’s behavior, it could be a trauma response you're describing. It could be other things, too, of course, but "trauma response" is definitely in the ballpark of possibilities.
Trauma therapists sometimes categorize trauma responses as following one of 4 patterns: fight, flight, freeze, or fawn, and there are many examples of each.
A trauma response might look like someone responding aggressively to a seemingly innocuous comment. People sometimes refer to this as an "overreaction" and can be experienced as abusive.
A trauma response might come in the form of a person's lack of response in a situation where it would seem to call for one, such as someone standing stoically and stuck in an almost frozen posture.
A trauma response may take the form of nervous laughter at what seems to be an unfunny situation, or cracking a joke at an inappropriate time in order to ease the discomfort of the moment.
It might look like a person who just wants to get away and forget an experience happened at all, with a "leave me alone" demand or all too familiar "I'm fine" retort we so often hear when someone is clearly anything but.
Trauma responses can take the form of fierce independence such that there is an all out refusal to accept help from anyone under any circumstances, even if help is needed.
I've seen trauma responses that take the form of excessive defensiveness to the point where a person is unable to receive any type of constructive feedback in their job or sport.
These are all examples of trauma responses, and there are many others.
Fight. Flight. Freeze. Fawn.
It's important to point out a person who is unaware of their trauma triggers and subsequent trauma responses does not have a whole lot of control over them. In fact, it is common for a person to look back on their behavior after the fact and feel amazed, if not ashamed and remorseful, or maybe even confused, over how they acted.
Trauma responses are not a person’s fault; however, they are a person's responsibility to manage.
Taking responsibility for trauma responses means learning about what triggers them.
Taking responsibility for trauma responses means empowering oneself to heal the original trauma that caused the responses to form in the first place.
Taking responsibility for trauma responses means doing the hard work of developing new ways of coping with intense feelings.
By taking responsibility for your trauma triggers and responses, you will reduce the frequency and intensity with which they occur, and you will minimize potential harm caused to others.
Trauma therapy can help you empower yourself to take responsibility for your trauma responses through trauma healing. Please visit me at www.carriemosko.com to learn about the types of trauma therapy I provide in my private practice, S.H.E. Therapeutic.
Out.
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