With so many motivational speakers and coaches out there these days, it’s easy to see why so much emphasis has been placed on the power of “getting motivated” in one’s life.
This doesn't fall solely on the shoulders of speakers and coaches, either.
There is, in fact, a whole therapeutic modality devoted to understanding the stages of change relative to one’s level of motivation.
Entire theories have been built on the premise one must have an adequate level of motivation before change can occur.
While I agree motivation is a contributing factor in the process of change, I could not disagree more that it is the main one.
In fact, I will go so far as to say the quickest way to ensure you will not follow through on a behavior change you’d like to see yourself make is to hinge your success on how motivated you feel, and here’s why.
Motivation is fluid at best and terribly flakey at worst. Few things wax and wane so notoriously as does motivation. Our level of motivation can oscillate from day to day, hour to hour, even moment to moment. Yet, this is where we’ve been told our power lies in the pursuit of change. No wonder changing is so difficult!
The inadequacy of motivation in effecting change looks something like this:
A patient comes in for their therapy session wanting to make a behavioral change.
Normally the behavior change being sought centers on some sort of healthy endeavor,
like exercise, or nutrition, but it doesn’t have to be. It could be cleaning the house, or
even showering (something that can be particularly challenging when a person is in the
midst of a clinical depression, for example). After discussing their reasons for wanting
to make the change, the ways they will benefit from said change, and putting together a
plan for enacting the change, they inevitably come back the next week not having
executed the plan for change. Change has, thus, not occurred, leaving the patient
feeling frustrated and helpless. When asked about what got in the way of them
following through on their plan to achieve their goal for change, a common reason they
will cite is “I just couldn’t get myself motivated.”
The truth is it’s not motivation they are lacking; it’s discipline.
Let's unpack this for moment.
The word “discipline” comes from the Latin word disciplina, meaning "instruction and training" as well as discipulus, the Latin word for "pupil." It is derived from the root word discere—which means ”to learn.”
The word "motivation"shares its root with "emotion," both of which come from the Latin motere which means to move.
Whereas motivation is fluid, highly sensitive, and susceptible to fluctuation for any number of reasons, just like our emotions come and go, discipline is steady, stable, predictive. One never really knows where their level of motivation might fall on any given day, but it almost doesn't matter if they are leaning more heavily on the control and order of discipline.
This is not to say motivation does not matter at all - it does, and it has its role in the "change" process, as previously stated. But to place all your eggs in the basket of getting, or staying motivated when attempting to make a change in your life is to set yourself up for failure every time. It's simply unreliable.
Challenge yourself to become more disciplined in your life and watch motivational barriers to change dissolve.
Out.
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